Sexual Assault!!!

A couple goes on vacation to a fishing resort. The husband likes to fish at the crack of dawn. The wife likes to read. One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and continues to read her book.


Along comes a game warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning Ma'am. What are you doing?"


"Reading a book," she replies.


"You're in a restricted fishing area," he informs her.


"I'm sorry officer, but I'm not fishing, I'm reading." "Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."


"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman.


"But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden. "That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."


"Have a nice day ma'am", and he left...

Sex on the beach

Jenny was sitting on a beach, attempting to strike up a conversation with the attractive gentleman reading on the blanket beside hers. "Hello, sir," she said, "Do you like movies?" "Yes, I do," he responded, then returned to his book. Jenny persisted, "Do you like gardening?" The man again looked up from his book, "Yes, I do," he said politely before returning to his reading. Undaunted, Jenny asked, "Do you like pussycats?" With that, the man dropped his book and pounced on Jenny, ravaging her as she'd never been ravaged before. As the cloud of sand began to settle, Jenny dragged herself to a sitting position and panted, "How did you know that was what I wanted?" The man thought for a moment and replied, "How did you know my name was Katz?"