Santa`s Furniture Business

Santa, a furniture dealer decided that he wanted to expand the line of furniture in his store, so he decided to go to Paris to see what he could find.

After arriving in Paris (this being his first trip ever to the French capital), he met with some manufacturers and finally selected a new range of furniture that he thought would sell well back home in India.

To celebrate the new acquisition, he decided to visit a pub and have a glass of wine. As he sat down enjoying his wine, soon enough, a very beautiful attractive young lady came to his table, asked him something in French (which he did not understand), and motioned toward the chair.

He invited her to sit down. He tried to speak to her in Hindi, Punjabi & English, but she did not speak or know any of these languages. So, after a couple of minutes of trying to communicate with her, he took a napkin and drew a picture of a wine glass and showed it to her.

She nodded, and he ordered a glass of wine for her.

After sitting together at the table for a while, he took another napkin, and drew a picture of a plate with food on it, and she nodded.

They left the pub and found a quiet cafe that featured a small group playing romantic music. They ordered dinner, after which he took another napkin and drew a picture of a couple dancing.

She nodded, and they got up to dance. They danced until the cafe closed and the band was packing up.

Then, after they were back at their table, the young lady took a napkin and drew a picture of a bed.

Till this day, the Santa has no idea how she figured out that he was in the furniture business!.....

Letter of Banta Singh to Bill Gates

Dear Mr. Bill Gates,


This letter is from Banta Singh from Punjab. We have bought a computer


for our home and we found problems, which I want to bring to your


notice.


1. After connecting to internet we planned to open e-mail account and


whenever we fill the form in Hotmail in the password column, only ******


appears, but in the rest of the fields whatever we typed appears, but


we face this problem only in password field. We checked with hardware


vendor Santa Singh and he said that there is no problem in keyboard.


Because of this we open the e-mail account with password *****. I


request you to check this as we ourselves do not know what the password is.


2. We are unable to enter anything after we click the 'shut down '


button.


3. There is a button 'start' but there is no "stop" button. We request


you to check this.


4. We find there is 'Run' in the menu. One of my friend clicked 'run '


has ran upto Amritsar! So, we request you to change that to "sit", so


that we can click that by sitting.


5. One doubt is that any 're-scooter' available in system? As I find


only 're-cycle', but I own a scooter at my home.


6. There is 'Find' button but it is not working properly. My wife lost


the door key and we tried a lot for tracing the key with this ' find',


but unable to trace. Is it a bug??


7. Every night I am not sleeping as I have to protect my 'mouse' from


CAT, So I suggest u to provide one DOG to kill that cat.


8. Please confirm when u are going to give me money for winning


'HEARTS' (playing cards in games) and when are u coming to my home to collect


ur money.


9. My child learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft


sentence', so when u will provide that?

Would You Remarry?

Jeeto: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?" Santa: "Definitely not!" Jeeto: "Why not - don't you like being married?" Santa: "Of course I do." Jeeto: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?" Santa: "Okay, I'd get married again." Jeeto: "You would? (with a hurtful look on her face). Santa: (makes audible groan). Jeeto: 'Would you live in our house?' Santa: 'Sure, it's a great house.' Jeeto: 'Would you sleep with her in our bed?' Santa: 'Where else would we sleep?' Jeeto: 'Would you let her drive my car?' Santa: 'Probably, it is almost new.' Jeeto: 'Would you replace my pictures with hers?' Santa: 'That would seem like the proper thing to do.' Jeeto: 'Would you give her my jewellry?' Santa: 'No, I'm sure she'd want her own.' Jeeto: 'Would she wear my shoes?' Santa: 'No, her size is 6.' Jeeto: Silence................. Santa: 'Shit'.