Showing posts with label punjabi jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label punjabi jokes. Show all posts

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Letter of Banta Singh to Bill Gates



Dear Mr. Bill Gates,


This letter is from Banta Singh from Punjab. We have bought a computer


for our home and we found problems, which I want to bring to your


notice.


1. After connecting to internet we planned to open e-mail account and


whenever we fill the form in Hotmail in the password column, only ******


appears, but in the rest of the fields whatever we typed appears, but


we face this problem only in password field. We checked with hardware


vendor Santa Singh and he said that there is no problem in keyboard.


Because of this we open the e-mail account with password *****. I


request you to check this as we ourselves do not know what the password is.


2. We are unable to enter anything after we click the 'shut down '


button.


3. There is a button 'start' but there is no "stop" button. We request


you to check this.


4. We find there is 'Run' in the menu. One of my friend clicked 'run '


has ran upto Amritsar! So, we request you to change that to "sit", so


that we can click that by sitting.


5. One doubt is that any 're-scooter' available in system? As I find


only 're-cycle', but I own a scooter at my home.


6. There is 'Find' button but it is not working properly. My wife lost


the door key and we tried a lot for tracing the key with this ' find',


but unable to trace. Is it a bug??


7. Every night I am not sleeping as I have to protect my 'mouse' from


CAT, So I suggest u to provide one DOG to kill that cat.


8. Please confirm when u are going to give me money for winning


'HEARTS' (playing cards in games) and when are u coming to my home to collect


ur money.


9. My child learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft


sentence', so when u will provide that?

Thursday, February 16, 2012

More Sardarji Jokes



Sardar wins 20 cr from Rs. 20 lottery ticket. Dealer gave 11 cr after
deducting tax.
Angry Sardar: "Give me 20 crore or else return my Rs.20 back.
****
Sardar proposed to a Girl
Girl said 'I'm 1 year older to you'
Sardar replied: 'Oye No Problem Soniye, I'll marry you NEXT
YEAR.
****
Sardar: I hav'nt slept all nite in the train.
Friend: Y?
Sardar: Got upper berth.
Friend: Y did'nt u Xchnged?
Sardar: oye, there was nobody 2 Xchng in the lower berth..
****
Sardar tells a girl "Come 2 my house at nite, nobody will b
there....... ...... Girl goes at night & realy nobody was there
****
A Teacher lecturing on population - In India after Every 10 sec a women gives birth to a kid.
A Sardar stands up- we must find & stop her!.
****
Sardar-why r all these people running?
Man- This is a race, the winner will get the cup.
Sardar-If only the winner will get the cup, why r others running?
****
19 SARDARS WENT 4A FILM.ON ASKING THEM Y THEY CAME IN A BIG GROUP OF 19?
THEY REPLIED THAT THE FILM WAS ONLY FOR ABOVE 18...
****
Sardarji standing below a tube light with a open mouth......
WHY?
because his doctor advised 'light' dinner.
****
Sardarji was filling up application form for a job. He was not sure as
to what to be filled in column "Salary Expected".
After much thought he wrote : Yes!
****
Sardar told his servant: Go and water the plants. Servant: It"s already
raining. Sardar: So what take an umbrella and go.
****
Santa! Your daughter has died!
Depressed, Sardar jumps from 100th floor
At 50th floor he remembers I don't have a daughter!
At 25flr:I'm unmarried!
At 10flr:I'm Banta not santa
****
What does a sardar do after taking a xerox?
He will compare it with the original for any spelling mistakes.
****
Sardar & his wife buy coffee in a shop.
Sardar says... Drink quickly..... .
Wife asks why...
sardar says hot coffee Rs5 and cold coffee Rs10
****
Sardar's wish :when i die,i wanna die like my grandpa who died peacefuly
in his sleep not screaming like all d passengers in d car he was
driving..
****
Sardar at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what
you call modern art ?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, that's a mirror!
****
Sardar was writing something very slowly.
Friend asked:" Why r u writing so slowly?
Sardar: "I'm writing 2 my 6 yr old son, he can't read very fast.
****
Flash news: A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard in punjab .
Local sardars have so far found 500 bodies and are still digging for more..
****
Sardar visits Chinese friend dying in hospital.
Man says CHIN YU YAN n dies.
Srdr goes2 china 2 find meaning of friends last words.
It is 'U R STANDNG ON THE OXYGEN TUBE!"
****
Sardarji was standing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed.
His wife asked what you are doing ?
He said-I m seeing how i look while sleeping.

Santa Banta Once Again



Banta: When I get mad at u, u never fight back. How do u control ur anger?
Preeto: I clean the toilet.
Banta: How does that help?
Preeto: I use ur toothbrush.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Jeeto: U know, husband & wife aren't allowed to be together in heaven!
Santa: Yes, I do.That's why it's called heaven!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa had a dream in which someone murdered him. Next day he closed his bank account. Know why?
Because the bank's slogan was: We make your dreams come true...
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa opened A College. Guess the Name of College?
The Name of the the College was: WOMEN`S COLLEGE FOR BOYS
-------------------------------------------------------------
Pappu: Dad, what is an idiot?
Santa: An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can't understand him. Do you understand me?
Pappu: No.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa found the answer to the most difficult question ever: What will come first, Chicken or egg?
O Yaar, what ever U order first, will come first.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Teacher: what do u call a person who cannot hear anything?
Santa: U can call him anything, because he cannot hear anything.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Angry Santa to his son: Have you ever seen an owl?
Pappu: (Looking down) No...
Santa: Don't look down. Look at me.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa: I got married because I was tired of cooking, cleaning home and washing clothes.
Banta: Amazing, I got divorce for the same reason.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Doctor asks Santa to give urine sample, stool & sperm sample for his yearly checkup.
Santa: I'm in a hurry doc, can I leave my underwear!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Interviewer: What is skeleton?
Santa: Skeleton is a person who started dieting but forgot to stop it..!!!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa sent SMS to his BOSS: Me sick, no work.
Boss SMS back: When I am sick I kiss my wife try it.
Two hours later Santa sms 2 boss: Me ok, ur wife very sweet.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Shopkeeper: This sweater's made of pure virgin wool sir.
Santa: You see I am not interested in the morals of the sheep. Just tell me, will it keep me warm?
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa: How's Ur Sex Life?
Banta: As ususal great, Monday to Friday.
Santa: What about the weekends?
Banta: Weekends? Oh! that time I'm at home, relaxing with my wife.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Banta to his servant: Go and water the plants.
Servant: It's already raining.
Banta: So what, take an umbrella and go.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Postman: I have to come 5 miles to deliver u this packet.
Santa: Why did u come so far. Instead U could have posted it.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Why did Santa sleep with a scale?
Because he wanted to measure how long he has Slept.
-------------------------------------------------------------
What a rip-off! Santa picked up a book called 37 Mating Positions. He goes home, opens it... and it turns out to be a book on chess!
-------------------------------------------------------------
An Englishman and Banta inside the toilet.
Englishman: Good evening, how do u do?
Banta: Gud evening, we open the zip and do.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa bought a car on loan... He didn't pay the dues, the bank took away his car.
Santa: If I knew this, I'd have taken a loan for my marriage also!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Banta was driving his car in a zigzag fashion on the road. Traffic inspector stopped him.
Banta: I'm learning car driving.
Inspector: Without the instructor?
Banta: Correspondence Course!
-------------------------------------------------------------
The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn't paying attention in class.
She called on him and said, "Pappu! What are 4, 2, 28 and 44?"
Little Johnny quickly replied, "Cartoon Network, Ten Sports, Discovery Channel and Pogo!"
-------------------------------------------------------------
Teacher: U call ur mother as MUM... what'll u call ur mother's younger sister & elder sister?
Santa's son: Mini Mum & Maxi Mum!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa's father gave him a gun on wedding night & said: Fire in air if ur wife is virgin, shoot her if not.
Santa fired in air 1st night & shot her 2nd night.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Boss: I'm giving u driver's job. Starting salary Rs. 3000, is it OK ?
Santa: U R great sir! Starting salary is Ok but how much is DRIVING salary?
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa & Banta were looking at Egyptian mummy.
Santa: Look so many bandages, pakka lorry accident case. Banta: Aaho, lorry number is also written... BC 1760 !!!.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Banta: What do you call a wife who is beautiful, intelligent, understanding, caring, never jealous and a great cook?
Santa: Niri Afwah !!!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa gets a Cheque & throws it on the ground. Can you Guess why?
To see whether it'll BOUNCE or not!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Banta was traveling in an auto rickshaw with his wife. The driver adjusted the mirror.
Banta shouted: U r trying to see my wife, sit back, I'll drive!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa looked in the mirror & said: Seems I've seen him some where.
Then he says: Oh yes! He's the same bastard who was standing next to my wife in my wedding album.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Pappu: Dad what's Sex?
Santa gets tensed but explains everything. 
Pappu: But dad how do I write all that in this small box of school admission form?
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa declares: I'll never marry in my life and I'll give same advice to my children also.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa: I'd like some Vitamins for my son.
Clerk: Sir, vitamin A, B or C ?
Santa: Any will do as my son doesn't know the albhabets yet.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Gal: I think the poorest people are the happiest.
Banta: Then marry me and we'll be the happiest.
-------------------------------------------------------------
What's an adult joke?
Santa: Any joke which is eighteen years old.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa: What is the similarity between Bill Gates and Me? 
Banta: Don't know.
Santa: Well... He never comes to my house & I never go to his!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa & Banta are walking down the road when Banta says: Look at that dog with one eye!
Santa covers one of his eyes and says: Where?
-------------------------------------------------------------
Girl: Will you love me after marriage also?
Santa: This depends on your husband, if he allows me.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Jeeto to Santa: Stop looking at girls, u r married now.
Santa: U mean if I am on diet, I can't look at the menu also?
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa drinking heavily in bar gets up and farts loudly. Man next to him: Excuse me, but you just farted before my wife.
Santa: Sorry, I didn't know it was her turn
-------------------------------------------------------------
Heights of Friendship: Santa commiting suicide, someone asked the reason. He said: My wife ran with my friend and I can't live without my friend.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa: I tried your number so many times, it always said 'Switched Off'!"
Banta: Nooo, it's my HELLO TUNE!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa was writing the passive voice of 'I made a mistake.'
He wrote: I was made by a mistake.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa to his son: I think it's right time we should talk about sex!
Pappu: Sure dad, what do u wanna know...?
-------------------------------------------------------------
An ATM's jammed & failed when operated by Santa. Why? B'coz he put a pin from his turban when asked: Enter ur Pin
-------------------------------------------------------------
Teacher: Pappu, describe digestive system of a human being.
Pappu: Very simple, it starts with right hand & ends with left hand.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Two days of powercut in Delhi had made life miserable. Worst affected was Delhi Metro station where families of Santa & Banta were struck for 48 hrs on Escalators.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Lady Secretary: Sir, it's your wife's call. She wants to kiss you on the phone.
Santa: Take message and give me later.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa: What food you feed your new born baby?
Beautiful young Mom: Breast milk & Orange juice...
Santa: Oye, which side is orange juice?
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa was busy in removing a wheel from auto, Banta asks: Why are you removing a wheel from your auto?
Santa: Can't you read 'Parking for two wheelers only'
-------------------------------------------------------------
See what a spelling mistake can do...
Santa went to Goa. Sent SMS to his wife: Having a wonderful time, wish u were Her
-------------------------------------------------------------
Banta: Some people can tell time by looking at the sun.
Santa: But I've never been able to see the numbers
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa joined NASA. After one month the Americans had to change the name from NASA to SATYANASA
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa: Today is Sunday & I wanna enjoy, so I bought 3 movie tickets
Jeeto: Why 3?
Santa: For u n ur parents
-------------------------------------------------------------
Banta: Y do u take ur wife only to night clubs?
Santa: By the time she gets ready no other place is open
-------------------------------------------------------------
Museum Administrator: That's a 500 year old statue u've broken.
Banta: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Banta: I've discovered the origin of the word Good-Bye
Santa: Oh, yeah? What's it? Banta: Many years ago, some husband said to his wife, 'I'm leaving u!' & the wife said: Good! Bye!
-------------------------------------------------------------
At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh!
Santa: Control urself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying?
-------------------------------------------------------------
Banta: U cheated me.
Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.
Banta: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says This is all India Radio!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Banta: U looked troubled, what's ur prob?
Santa: I'm going to b a father
Banta: But, that's wonderful
Santa: What's wonderful! My wife doesn't know about it yet
-------------------------------------------------------------
Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?
Santa: Tipu's skeleton.
Tourist: Whose that smaller skeleton next to it?
Santa: That's Tipu's skeleton when he was child
-------------------------------------------------------------
Banta: Y did u buy ur wife a huge diamond ring for her B'day? I thought she wanted a car.
Santa: She did, but where in the world was I going to find a fake car?
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa: If I die will u remarry?
Jeeto: No! I'll stay with my sister. But if I die will u remarry?
Santa: No, I'll also stay with ur sister
-------------------------------------------------------------
Jeeto & Preeto were talking about their new milkman.
Jeeto: He's very good looking, punctual & dresses so smartly.
And so quickly too!, said Preeto
-------------------------------------------------------------
A man to Santa: Ur friend is kissing ur wife in ur home.
Santa rushes home and came back within half an hour n slapped the man n said: He's not my friend.
-------------------------------------------------------------
While walking in the highlands Santa fell down a deep hole.
Banta: R u ok?
Santa: Yeah!
Banta: Did u break anything?
Santa: No, there's nothing down here
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa sent a SMS to his pregnant wife. Couple of seconds later he received a report on his phone and he started to dance. The report said: 'Delivered'
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa was standing in sun on a hot sunny day.
Banta asked: What are you doing? 
Santa: Drying sweat
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa was looking at a painting for a long time of a naked woman with leaves covering the body, he was asked what he was doing and he answered: Waiting for autumn.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Jeeto yelled at Santa: U're gonna b really sorry! I'm going to LEAVE you!
Santa: Make up ur mind! Which one is it gonna be?
-------------------------------------------------------------
Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatoes 5 days ago, he hasn't come back yet!
Santa: Why don't u cook something else.
-------------------------------------------------------------
A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.
Santa doesn't turns up for 4 days. 
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I'm coming daily since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out
-------------------------------------------------------------
Teacher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller?
Pappu: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Pappu while filling up a form: What should I write against mother tongue.?
Santa: Very long.....!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Banta asked Santa: Why Manmohan Singh goes for a walk in evening?
Santa: Very simple, because he is PM not AM
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa falls in luv with a nurse... After much thinking, he finally writes a love letter to her: "I luv u sister."
-------------------------------------------------------------
Nurse came out with the newborn kid, Santa rushed 2 her & after seeing the kid he shouted, PUTTAR hua PUTTAR. She slapped him: Leave my finger, u fool, It's a gal
-------------------------------------------------------------
Jeeto: If I die what'll you do?
Santa: I may also die.
Jeeto: Why?
Santa: Some time too much of happiness can also kill a man.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Santa: What's difference between man & Superman?
Pappu: Man wears underwear under the trouser & superman wears it over the trouser.
-------------------------------------------------------------

Thursday, December 15, 2011

SARDAR JOKES


Train mein ek husband apni wife say: "tujh say shadi kar ke pachta raha hoon."

"dil karta hai tujhe kuttay ke aagay daal doon"

Samnay wala passenger bola: "bhao bhao"
~~~~~~~~~
Wife : mere iraday bare nek hain, aap hazaaron mein ek hain.

Sardar : mera deemag bara tez hai, pehlay yeh bata baki 999 kaun hain?
~~~~~~~~~
Sardar looked himself in mirror and said:
Is ko kahin dekha hai. Then he said:

Oye yaad aya, yeh to wohi kamina hai jo
Shaadi ki album mein meri biwi ke saath hai

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Santa Joke

Santa was busy in removing a wheel from auto,

Banta asks: Y r u removing a wheel from ur auto?

Santa: Can't u read 'Parking for two wheelers only'
************ ********* ********* ****
Santa: Doctor, ye phulon ki mala kis ke liye?

Doctor: Ye mera pehla operation hai, success hua to mere liye, nahi to tumhare liye.
************ ********* ********* ****
Santa: Doc Saab, mein Chashma laga ke pad to sakoonga?

Doc: Haan, bilkul.

Santa: To phir theek hai doc Saab varna Anpad aadmi ki zindagi bhi koi zindagi hai.
************ ********* ********* ****
Santa: Raat film main ek chudail kabhi mere aage, khabhi mere peechhe ghoom rahi thi...

Jeeto: Koun is film thi ?

Santa: Apni shaadi ki movie thi !
************ ********* ********* ****
Santa joined NASA. After one month the Americans had to change the name from NASA to SATYANASA
************ ********* ********* ****
Banta: Yeh chaaku kyon ubaal rahe ho?

Santa: Suicide karne ke liye

Banta: To phir ubalne kui kya zaroorat hai?

Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaye
************ ********* ********* ****
Santa: Today is Sunday & I wanna Enjoy, so I bought 3 movie tickets

Jeeto: Why 3?

Santa: For you and your parents
************ ********* ********* ****
Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue u've broken.

Banta: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.
###################################
sardar
Sardar shouting 2 his girl friend " u said v will do register marriage and cheated me, I was waiting 4 u yesterday whole day in the post office...."
~~~~~~~~~
A Tamilian call up sardar and asks " Tamil therima??"
Sardar got mad, angrily replied.... "Hindi tera baap!!!"
********************************************************

Saturday, June 4, 2011

Bhabhiji's Name

Laughter Is A Best Medicine.

Santa: Bhabiji ka naam kya hai?

Banta: Google Kaur

Santa: Eh? Ye kya naam hai Santa?

Banta: Ek sawaal karo, dus jawaab milega......

Saturday, April 9, 2011

ULTIMATE MACHINE


A lie machine is bought. It works in the following way.....
If the truth is told- the machine wont give any sound If a lie is told- the machine will give a sound 'KIRRRRRRRR.. . '
Now there are three Indians.One Bengali,one Madrasi and one Sardarji.
Their correspondences are given infront of the lie machine.Here it goes......
Bengali :- 'I think I can eat 30 rosogullas at a time!'
Lie machine:-'KIRRRRRRRR.. .'

Bengali:-'No no, I think I can eat 10 rosogullas at a time'
Lie machine:- no sound(truth is told)
Madrasi:-'I think I can eat 25 dosas at a time'
Lie machine:-'KIRRRRRRRR.. .'

Madrasi:-'No no,I think I can eat 10 dosas at a time'
Lie machine:-no sound(truth)

Sardarji:-'I think....'
Lie machine:- 'KIRRRRRRRR.. .'

Sardarji:-'I think...'
Lie machine:-'KIRRRRRRRR.. .'.

Sardarji:-'I think...'
Lie machine:-'KIRRRRRRRR.. .'

Sardarji:-'I think...'
Lie machine:-''KIRRRRRRRR.. .'

Sardarji:-'I think...'
Lie machine:-''KIRRRRRRRR.. .'

Sardarji:-'I think...'
Lie machine:-''KIRRRRRRRR.. .'

Sardarji:-'I think...'
Lie machine:-''KIRRRRRRRR.. .'

Sardarji:-'I think...'
Lie machine:-''KIRRRRRRRR...

******

Monday, April 4, 2011

Missed Call


Banta Singh and Santa Singh got tired using cell phones and for a change decided to use really ancient methods of communication. They decided to use pigeons to send messages.

So they went and bought expensive carrier pigeons from the Jama Masjid market in old Delhi and found to their joy that the pigeons indeed could be trained and the birds very easily learnt to return directly to their respective homes. And so this scheme worked very fine.

One day Santa sends his pigeon.

When the pigeon reaches to Banta it is without message.

Banta picked his mobile and asked Santa "What is this joke? The pigeon is without any message!!!"

Santa said "Oye khotey, this was a missed call."

PUNJABI LOVE LETTER


Dear meri dil ki katori,

Mai kya ji, it was ji very well since the time I put my eyes on you at Bunty's wedding.

The parrots flew out of my hands, when u turned like a truck on a blind curve and smiled at me.

Now I see ur face everywhere, even in my chicken-curry. The butter chicken reminds me your sweet voice.

Mai kya ji, would you be the butter on my naan and the chicken in my curry of life....!!!!

Koi gal nahi, take ur time but don't put the foot on the Brakes of my love ji.

What to do, I to have started thinking about Shaadi-Vaadi. Karao maat wait, say yes for a date!

Balle Balle ......

P'njaab Airways


P'njaab Airways : IN-FLIGHT ANNOUNCEMENT

Gud marning, Ladies and Gen'lemen. P'rajee aur Behnjee. Sat Sri Akal.

On behalf of Captaan Balbir Singh 'Bobby', this is your Flight Supervisor Banta Singh " Bunty" welcoming to you on the P'njaab Airways flight no. 9211 (Nau Do Gyaraah) to Ludhiana.

We apalogize for the two-day delay in taking off, b'cause the sun was not shining brightly in the fog. And we are knowing the sun does not shine in the night.

Landing in Ludhiana is not dafinite, but with good luck we can be landing d'rectly in your v'llage.

P'njaab Airways has exc'llant record for safety. In fact our safety standards are so high that even the fully trained tarrists and hijackers are afraid to fly with us.

I am pleased to 'nounce that starting this year over 90% of our p'ssaingers have reached to their dest'nation.

For the rest 10%, the P'njaab Airways staff has lots of experience for consoling the next-of-kin. Our Hostess Bubbly Kaur will be haippy to brief you on our out-of-court settlement policies.

If engines are too noisy, on p'ssainger request, we can turn them off for comfart, but your flight will become late and you may become the late also.

For our religious p'ssaingers, we are the only airline who can help you to contact God at once. In case of sudden loss of cabin pressure, Holy Books will be quickly distributed.

We regret that today's in-flight movie will not be shown as we could not record it from the tallyvision due to power cut.

But we will be flying right naxt to Air India, where their movie can be seen from the right side cabin windows. These windows have been opened

For your viewing convenience. For p'ssaingers on left side, we have put binoculars under the seat.

If AirIndia flight is again cancelled, then for your in-flight ent'tainment. Our hostesses Bubbly Kaur & Cuckoo Kaur will do the Bhangra with flight stewards Pappu and Tappu. Oye, Balle Balle!!

Your in-flight Menu has a choice of Chicken Tikka Masala, Tandoori Fish, Dal makhani, unlimited P'ronthas and Lassi.

There is a half charge for Red Label Whiskey served from Black Label bottles. Patiala pegs will be served only on Patiala flights.

As per safety rules, smoking is not allowed on all P'njaab Airways flights over P'njaab. Any smoke you see in the cabin is only the early warning system on the engines.

Please do read the 'structions on the Safety Card in seat pocket in your front side. It is not a hand fan.

The P'ssainger behind you must read the card in your backside.

Life jackets are placed under your seats for emergency water landings on any of our 5 rivers. Do not use life jackets on the land.

Kindly keep your seat in upright position for take-off & landing. Also do not use force. Broken seats will not be replaced and you will be tied to the floor during take off and landing.

Please be seated first and then fasten your seatbelts. Do not call for steward or airhostess for a glass of water when plane is taking off.

We are about to take-off. We wish you a pleasant flight. For air sikness problems we have echo friendly jute bags in the sit pokets

Thank you once again for flying with P'njaab Airways