Showing posts with label mafia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mafia. Show all posts

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Stolen Money



A Mafia Godfather finds out that his book-keeper has screwed him for ten million bucks.


 This book-keeper is deaf and it was considered an occupational benefit why he got the job in the first place, since it was assumed that a deaf book-keeper would not be able to hear anything and never have to testify in court.


When the Godfather goes to shake down the book-keeper about his missing $10 million bucks, he takes along his lawyer, who knows sign language.


The Godfather asks the book-keeper: "Where is the $10 million bucks you embezzled from me?"


The lawyer, using sign language, asks the book-keeper where the money is hidden.


The book-keeper signs back: "I don't know what you are talking about."


The lawyer tells the Godfather: "He says he doesn't know what you're talking about."


That's when the Godfather pulls out a 9mm pistol, puts it to the book-keeper's temple, cocks it up and says: "Ask him again!"


The attorney signs to the underling: "He'll kill you for sure if you don't tell him!"


The book-keeper signs back: "OK! You win! The money is in a brown briefcase, buried behind the shed in my cousin Enzo's backyard in Queens!"


The Godfather asks the lawyer: "Well, what'd he say?"


The lawyer replies: "He says you don't have the guts to pull the trigger!!"

Monday, March 26, 2012

Advise Mafia Style



An old Italian Mafia Don is dying and he calls his grandson to his bed.

'Lissin-a me. I wanna for you to taka my chrome plated .38 revolver so you will always remember me.'


'But grandpa, I really don't lika guns. Howz about you leava me your Rolex watch instead?'



'Looka here sonnie. Somma day you gonna runna da business..you gonna have a beautifula wife, lotsa money, a biga home and maybe a couple a bambinos.'


'Somma day you gonna comma home and maybe find you wife inna bed with another man. Whadda you gonna do then. pointa  to you watch and say 'Times up'?'